MINDY DAVIS

In a world ever expanding through the connections of professional and social engagements, we simply cannot hide who we are and not expect to be found out eventually. Though one may project a certain image of person through their channels of expression and words, the truth always comes to surface. People talk about others, or ask in curiosity the impressions their actions have given. We base career paths on the reputations of those whom will manage, and relationships on whether there is trust between us. Friendships come and go depending largely on this singular and simple impression. Whether we trust the word of someone, or find them to be double dealing directly influences how we no only view them, but those they surround themselves with as well.

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Where one man is compared to a famous dictator, another might be viewed as an angel. Smoke and mirrors where there is no footing are confusing, and lies lead to distancing quickly because Trust is a number one priority. In a city full of choreographed and carefully curated cunning falsities, Los Angeles is a place where I like to use a Drop in the Bucket mentality of understanding those around me. Though success can be found in many ways, I wish to rise surrounded by those who seek to help others rise equally. 

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The Drop in the Bucket mentality is a simple concept that allows a more enlightened viewing and not so judgmental version of understanding life and its happenings. It was introduced to me by my little brother years ago, when he explained to me how he does not get upset with people. He simply witnesses what happens, their choices and motivations, their actions, and then moves on without harboring resentments over any of it. He imagines that each person in his sphere, has buckets all around them, and that whatever they do or choose gets put in those buckets. Over time, they fill up, showing him who people habitually are. For example, if their words do not align with their actions and the Lies Bucket grows to overflowing, he knows they are not to be trusted.

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It does no good for us to carry the weight of what we could judge in another, and it appears immature and unprofessional to voice it to others if delivered in a way that would not be considered truthful were the person being spoken about to hear us. What we say of another says more of ourselves then it does of them in some cases. If we would not like them to know about it, odds are it shouldn't be shared to begin with. Retelling the past that may no longer be the person in front of us is tricky business. Though we may desire to protect another from experiencing something unwanted happening, we may inadvertently create new problems that wouldn't have existed without our voicing the concern to begin with. We are all judged by those we surround ourselves with, as indications of who we choose to engage in work and personal relationships with.

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A most important piece I have found in crossing over to a more enlightened world, is acting as though I am always being watched and heard. I compose my messages as if they might be screen-shotted or forwarded to those I am writing about. I speak the words I wish to live, because where I focus most is what creates my world. I make the choices now that align me with the life I choose to live afterwards, in the understanding that I must be what I seek before it can show up to meet me. I choose my thoughts and actions as carefully as I would if the Matrix itself was scanning me to ascertain what it should project in front of me. 

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So much as I used to think that others controlled my destiny, evidence has shown and suggested it is actually all tied up in me. I am the center of gravity that the sun is ever encircling. It is my choices on how I view that which happens to me, that defines the actual experience I have quite directly. It is my ability to be grateful for those who show up in ways that disappoint me that point me to what I am more deeply wanting. The opportunities that do not work out for me align me with the drive to pursue other things entirely. Each person and setting that arrives is better than that which came before it, thereby proving that the letting go is actually a most important act in creating what is best. Chapter by chapter, life continues flowing forward.

 

I am so thankful for the wisdom that inherently exists in my little brother. Through something so simple as his way of categorizing those around him by their choices and actions without judgment or gossiping, I am able to better understand the motives of those around me, and forgive what I may not personally agree with. I get to see both sides of the coin, through actions taken of integrity and those taken without regard to moral anything. Self serving is ultimately what we are all doing anyways.

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Though I can forgive the things that others choose, that does not mean it is best to continue to surround myself with those who fill up the buckets which I do not personally. If we become who we are most with, then we will ultimately become more of it in allowing it. The mark of many enlightened people I know is that they do not tell anyone this secret. They simply keep on living. They keep their mouths shut instead of gossiping, and then act accordingly to change their reality. They are polite and courteous as one would be in any professional interaction, because we are all people within one human race, doing the best we can today with our given elements and circumstances. They detach emotionally from those who are not trustworthy if they do not lie personally, and then people that are honestly worthy appear to replace those they let go of. No scene needed.